Ep 81: The Middle: How to Hold On To Your Goal When There Is No Evidence Yet
Starting a big goal can be really exciting! You've made the decision. You know what you want. You're ready to go after it. But what happens a few months later when you're doing the work and nothing seems to be happening yet?
You're showing up and doing what you're supposed to be doing. But you still don't have much evidence that it's working.
That's what Dave and Jacq Conway call the “middle”.
And if you've ever gone after something big, you probably know exactly what that feels like. Well, in Episode #81 of The 30-Day Year Podcast, Dave and Jacq talk about what happens during that part of the process, especially when you start wondering:
Is this actually working?
How much longer am I supposed to keep going when I can't see any results yet?
And maybe the biggest question of all:
How do I keep believing in something when I don't have much evidence to believe in yet?
Dave has an interesting take on why people eventually give up. He says it isn't because they suddenly stop wanting what they wanted.
Their desire gets weaker.
So how do you keep that from happening? And what do you do when your own belief isn't enough to keep you going?
Tune in to this episode and find out!
In this episode, you'll discover…
Why it's completely understandable to want some evidence before you believe, and what happens when you're willing to keep going without it…
The “tramp” who spent five years pursuing his dream of becoming Thomas Edison's business partner, even with no evidence it was ever going to happen…
Why Dave believes people give up even when they still really want the goal…
What Dave means by “borrowing belief,” and how it helped him through one of the hardest years of his life…
Dave’s “When are you gonna quit?” graph and the tragic story of the men who stopped digging just three feet from gold…
Why working harder isn't always what gets you through the “middle”...
The little signs Dave looks for when there still isn't much outside evidence that things are working…
And much more!
Maybe you're in the middle of something right now. You've been working toward it for months. Maybe even years. You still want it.
You're just starting to wonder how much longer you can keep going without seeing something happen.
If that's where you are right now, you're definitely going to want to hear what Dave and Jacq have to say about it.
Tune in to Episode #81 of The 30-Day Year Podcast now!
Key Takeaways
1.) It’s Fair to Want PROOF Before You Believe (2:20)
Have you ever been working toward something for a long time and started thinking:
Can I please just get one little sign that this is actually working?
Jacq asks Dave about that in this episode.
Is it really fair to expect someone to keep believing when they have absolutely no evidence yet?
Dave says YES. Wanting some proof is completely understandable.
He even brings up “Doubting Thomas”, who wanted to see before he would believe.
But then Dave talks about the people who are able to keep believing before they have the evidence.
And he believes something very different becomes possible for them.
So what's different about believing before you can see?
Listen in now; Dave explains it in the episode!
2.) The “Tramp” Who Waited FIVE Years for His Chance (5:01)
Dave shares one of his favorite stories from Think and Grow Rich about a “tramp” named Edwin C. Barnes.
Barnes had one goal:
He wanted to become Thomas Edison's business partner.
There was just one small problem.
He had no money. No connections. And no invitation from Edison.
And for five years, he had virtually no evidence that what he wanted was ever going to happen.
But he kept going.
Why?
And what finally happened after those five years?
You'll definitely want to hear Dave tell this story now… tune in!
3.) Why Do People Give Up on Something They Still Want? (6:39)
Dave says:
“When people quit, it is not because they want to quit. It is because their desire weakens.”
Think about that.
You can still want the goal and give up on it anyway.
So if the problem isn't that you stopped wanting it, what happened?
And more importantly, how do you keep your desire strong when you've been working toward something for months or years and still don't have the result?
Tune in to find out!
4.) Dave’s “When are you gonna quit?” graph. (15:51)
Dave has something he calls his:
“When are you gonna quit?” graph.
Imagine there are 100 things that have to happen between the day you decide what you want and the day you finally get it.
Some are going to be good. Some are going to be really challenging.
And somewhere along the way, you're probably going to wonder whether you should keep going.
But here's the question:
What if you quit at #99?
That's when Dave brings up the famous Think and Grow Rich story of Three Feet From Gold.
They stopped digging.
Someone else kept going.
And what happened next is exactly why Dave tells this story when somebody is thinking about giving up.
Listen to the full episode now to hear it!
5.) What If Working Harder Isn't the Answer? (19:21)
When you're not getting the results you want, what's usually your first reaction?
Try harder. Work more. Do more.
Dave says that wasn't what ultimately changed things for him.
When he began his own 30-Day Year, he seriously underestimated how much he was going to have to change.
Not just what he did, but how he thought, what he believed, and how he saw himself.
And that raises a much bigger question:
Who would you have to become to produce the result you want?
Dave talks about what that looked like for him and why he believes it's such an important part of reaching a really big goal.
6.) One Evening. 50 People. And a $20,000 Surprise. The Night Dave and Jacq Realized They Had a Real Business on Their Hands (25:03)
For a long time, Dave and Jacq were doing the work without knowing exactly where it was going to lead.
Then one evening, something happened.
They held their first event.
About 50 people showed up.
And by the end of that night, four people had become clients and they'd generated $20,000 in sales.
Suddenly, they had something they didn't have before:
Evidence.
Something was working!
But Jacq and Dave didn't have that evidence when they started.
So what kept them going long enough to finally see it?
And how can you recognize the smaller “signals” that something may be working before you get your own $20,000 night?
Dave and Jacq talk about that in the episode. Tune in now!
What to Do Next…
If you're working toward something big and wondering why you still can't see the results yet, don't assume that means nothing is happening.
You may simply be in the “middle”.
So how do you keep your desire strong and keep going when you don't have the evidence yet?
That's what Episode #81 is all about.
Listen to the full episode, and then be sure to check out the free resources below!
Free Resources Mentioned In This Episode
🎯 FREE 30-Day Year Goal-Setting Guide
Think about the story Dave tells in this episode about Edwin C. Barnes.
For five years, Barnes had virtually no evidence that his goal was ever going to happen.
But he knew exactly what he wanted.
That's especially important when you're in the middle and starting to wonder whether you should keep going.
What are you actually working toward? And is it something you want badly enough to keep going after when the evidence isn't there yet?
Our FREE 30-Day Year Goal-Setting Guide will help you choose a goal that genuinely excites you, get very clear about exactly what you want, and start moving toward it, so you have something worth holding onto when things get hard and you feel like quitting.
Download the FREE 30-Day Year Goal-Setting Guide now!
🚀 FREE 21-Day Money Momentum Challenge
Maybe the goal you're working toward right now has to do with money.
Maybe you want to earn more. Build your business. Get out of debt. Or simply create more financial freedom in your life.
But as Dave talks about throughout this episode, the middle can get hard.
You're doing the work, but you're not seeing the results yet.
And that's when it can be tempting to quit.
But what if you're closer than you think?
What if you're only three feet from gold?
The FREE 21-Day Money Momentum Challenge gives you something simple to focus on every day for 21 days to help you pay more attention to the way you're thinking about money and keep moving toward the income you want, especially when you feel like quitting.
Begin the FREE 21-Day Money Momentum Challenge now!
🧠 FREE Visualization Checklist
When Jacq asks Dave, “how you keep your desire alive when you don't have the evidence yet”, one of the most important things he talks about is visualization.
In fact, Dave calls it one of the greatest practices he's ever used.
If you can continue seeing what you want in your mind, even when you can't see it in your life yet, it gives you something to keep moving toward.
In fact, Dave says:
“When we visualize, we have to understand what we're doing... WE ARE IMPRESSING IMAGES ON THE SUBCONSCIOUS MIND.”
* It appears that through repeated exposure and practice, certain images and vibrations that we plant in the subconscious mind (mental seeds) will begin to manifest in our life!
Our FREE Visualization Checklist gives you a simple, step-by-step way to practice that for yourself.
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In Episode 84 of the 30-Day Year Podcast, Dave and Jacq Conway answer real listener questions about marriage, parenting, and running a business together, with Dave hearing the questions for the first time on the mic. You'll learn why couples who create together thrive, how to support a partner who feels stuck, how to teach kids about mindset without it feeling like school, and how to turn your relationship into a mastermind.